Thursday, October 25, 2012

Dear Mr. Romney

Dear Mr. Romney,

There's a simple reason I can't vote for you in the upcoming Presidential election: you only believe in equality for heterosexuals.

It's sad, that in this day and age, inequality still exists. It's sad that a man who wants to run our country, does not believe in equality for all citizens of the United States of America. 

What's even worse is that you don't believe that I, as a gay man, have the right to sit beside my partner in the hospital should he be confined to ICU for some - heaven forbid - life threatening illness. You feel that only heterosexuals should have that privilege as you so in-eloquently put it.

And you want to run our country? 

The problem with your allegedly - have to use that word for legal reasons apparently - thinking is: people like you, men in power, shape the beliefs of others. When you - on the chance that a very hot place freezes over and you get elected President - strip away my right to sit at, again, heaven forbid, partner's side in the ICU, to comfort him, perhaps with my presence only, as you would do your wife in a similar situation - you encourage others to do the same. With your act of bullying, for that is what stripping away my right would be, you encourage others to do the same. You encourage people to discriminate against me, against those like me, and yet . . .

. . . you obviously don't have a problem sleeping at night.

You should have a problem sleeping at night. You should be ashamed of even considering stripping away such a right - and it is a right, Mr. Romney, not a privilege

Love knows no boundaries. 

I have been with my partner for 18 years. My love for him is as strong, or most likely stronger, than the love you have for your wife. My love is not diminished by men, or women, like you, that couch their hate with taken out of context text from the Bible. My love is not diminished by the laws that people like you try to pass in order to protect traditional marriage, or at least that's what you tell yourselves to ease your consciences. In fact, all the laws you and like minded individuals pass are nothing more than bullying, a soapbox to stand up and say that because you were born heterosexual, you have more rights than me, or any other members of the GLBT community.

I hate to break the news to you, Mr. Romney, but, you're not superior to me or anybody else on this planet. You're not better than me because you were born heterosexual. Your love for your wife isn't any greater than my love for my partner . . . because you were born heterosexual. You don't deserve anything differently out of this life than I do . . . because you were born heterosexual.

Yes, I know, you believe that because you were born heterosexual you have the right to bully me, to deny me equality, and to - again, on the off chance a very hot place freezes over and you are elected President - strip away my right to sit beside my partner if, heaven forbid, something bad happens to him and he's in the ICU! You believe, deep in your heart, that discrimination against non-heterosexuals is okay, fine and dandy, and all that jazz.

I'm here to tell you that it is not okay, fine and dandy, and all that jazz. It is wrong on so many levels and the fact that you can't see the wrongness, that you believe you are totally right, is another reason I can't vote for you this election.



Friday, October 12, 2012

Facebook and Not Friending

No rants today, just some idle thoughts.

I love Facebook. It has allowed me to reconnect with my cousins, which is a great thing. It allows me glimpses into their lives, and them glimpses into mine, and does the thing with all my myriad Facebook friends, some of whom I have met, and some of whom I have yet to meet, but have come to know quite well through our interaction in the blogsphere and on Facebook. Yes, I know, a run-on sentence. My English professors would be horrified. 

Anyhow, today, for some odd reason, I searched for someone from high school. I don't know why, just did. Then, scrolled through all their friends to see how many people from high school I might still recognize. Quite a few, just in case you were wondering. 

Then, as often happens in the chaotic spaces of my grey matter, I wondered . . . why am I not FB friends with anyone from high school?

The easy answer: I left Delaware, and all my high school friends, 29 years ago and went on with my life.

The second easy answer: I was only close friends with a very few people in high school. I lost touch with many of them years ago.

The third easy answer: If I wasn't friends with them in high school, why would I be friends with them now?

I think that's the main answer to my question. I've never been in a clique, or part of the popular crowd. I was more on the sidelines of life throughout school as I navigated the narrow-waters of my genetics, i.e., coming to terms with the fact I was gay.

If you haven't figured it out yet: some humans are downright cruel, and kids more so from the adults from which they learned such cruelty. So, obviously, if I knew I was gay in high school, other kids did too, and, well, kids are cruel. So, I stayed to the sidelines, with my little group of friends, and went on about my life.

Years ago, when I first created a Facebook account, a woman I went to high school with contacted me and wanted to be friends. I ignored her request. I wasn't friends with her in high school, so why bother was/is my attitude. Then, a friend I was close with contacted me. We messaged back and forth, I told her I was gay . . . and pretty much never heard from her again. Go figure!!! 

You see, being gay is how I was born and I choose not to associate with people who have a problem with me being gay. It's just how I roll.

Still, I find it odd that I haven't befriended on Facebook a single friend from high school. Okay, wait, I am friends with one friend from high school, but, my brother married her sister, so we have had contact throughout the years. Ha! Other than that, I haven't "liked" the high school - Brandywine High School, Wilmington, Delaware (DE) - page, or sent friend requests. Heck, my class, which is coming up on 30 years next June, doesn't even have it's own page for the reunion . . . not that I would go.

You see, I think I'm content with my life and the friends I have in my life. The past is the past. Yeah, it was neat looking at pictures of people I used to know, but that's enough for me. 

Perhaps - and as you can tell, I'm sort of rambling through my thoughts in a disjointed fashion - a part of me that was that guy in high school, afraid of rejection, tired of being made fun of because I fell outside the norm of what people considered the norm, will always wonder if people from high school who are sending friend requests are only sending them to confirm what they suspected in high school: is Scott gay?

Well, he is, proud of it, and has been in a committed relationship for the last 18 years. My friends and family love Frank. He's part of me, and he's part of my family. He even came to my family reunion this past June. Everybody loved him. In fact, my cousins were quite insistent on him coming to the reunion since he is part of the family.

And there, you see, is probably why I don't friend people from high school: my life is complete enough and those around me love me for me, and love Frank because he is a part of my life.

So, if you've stuck with this post long enough, you'll see there really wasn't a point to it, except for me to ramble on and on as I resolved some things in my mind. High School was great, but it was 29 years ago, and the Scott who existed then has turned into a person more comfortable with himself, and content with the life he has created for himself.